So Jose wants to touch his people and goes a bit nuts, leaping into the crowd after Torres’s late winner against Manchester City. He claims he wanted to celebrate with his son Jose Mario Junior (egotistical, moi?) who is 14 and now has a Chelsea season ticket behind the dugout. Or was Jose just trying to reserve a seat for the next time he’s sent off? Sadly, Mourinho Senior never made it to Jose Junior. He leapt into the stand like Superman, only to be impeded by man hugs from an amorous bloke in a purple t-shirt. Mourinho has form for this, having celebrated Porto’s Champions League defeat of Man United with that famous run down the touchline in his black overcoat.
Even the greatest gaffers can go effing mental. When Steve Bruce scored in Fergie-time for Man United against Sheffield Wednesday in 1993, United won the title after a gap of 26 years. Fergie reacted by dancing on the touchline like a drunken Scottish uncle over-celebrating at a Highland ceilidh while Brian Kidd fell to his knees, arms aloft and did a Basil Fawlty on the grass.
The best managerial celebrations are when the gaffer makes a complete idiot of himself. Paolo Di Canio celebrated a Sunderland goal at Newcastle with a crazy knee-slide, ripping the trousers of his suit in the process. Though the fact he was wearing a designer suit rather ruined the effect, as naff gear adds hugely to a gaffer going bonkers.
The daddy of them all is David Pleat, of course, who in 1983 celebrated Luton staying up at Man City by skipping across the pitch in a beige suit accessorised with white socks and hush puppies. Not far behind is Bob Stokoe, who reacted to Sunderland winning the FA Cup in 1973 by running across the pitch in a Colombo Mac and trilby, bizarrely worn over a tight red tracksuit, back in the days when bosses dressed as if they’d just found some fantastic bargains at the Oxfam shop.
A spot of dad dancing helps too. Ian Holloway did a gnomic jig as Palace beat Sunderland this season while Alan Pardew celebrated West Ham scoring in the 2006 FA Cup semi-final against Middlesbrough with a disco shuffle of his hips — the sort of thing that is usually only seen at weddings after eight hours of boozing. Even Roy Hodgson got caught out, celebrating Stevie Gerrard’s goal against Poland with a Pleat-esque hop on to the pitch with both fists raised above his head.
The thing with Jose though, is you never know how much is a pre-planned part of his ‘methodology’. It was noticeable during Mourinho’s celebration that his stylish scarf remained in place. He’s still got some things to learn about the English game. Next time Jose, please wear a too-tight beige suit and imagine you’re dancing to he Chicken Song or Agadoo at a wedding reception and you’ll be closer to the standard required…
WARREN’S TOP FIVE MANAGERS GOING BONKERS:
David Pleat: Manchester City v Luton 1983
Bob Stokoe: Sunderland v Leeds 1973
Alex Ferguson and Brian Kidd: Man United v Sheffield Wednesday 1993
Jose Mourinho: Man United v Porto 2004
Paolo Di Canio: Newcastle v Sunderland 2013